Boku no Shiranai Kimi

僕の知らない君 (Boku no Shiranai Kimi) · 我所不知道的你 · The Side to You That I Don’t Know

In:
[Album] Oku Hanako BEST -My Letters- – CD 1 track 13
[Single] Chiisana Hoshi – track 2

 

English

I will not cry in front of you, I hope you will quickly look away
I still feel miserable because my love for you remains

You seem to have changed in the long time since we last met
You’re wearing clothes I’ve never seen and your hair has been cut short
But on your wrist is a familiar watch; it was the first gift I gave you
It made me happy that I still remained somewhere in your heart

As I expected I can’t return to being just friends with you
You are right beside me, but there is nothing I can do to let you know

I will not cry in front of you, I hope you will quickly look away
I still feel miserable because my love for you remains

What went wrong? Why did this happen?
Even if I go through all the questions, I won’t find any answers

“It’s not that I don’t like you”
Surely you know it hurts me a lot to hear you say that

I won’t cry in front of you, even if I am thought of as a memory
I still feel miserable because my love for you remains

Actually, I was hoping a little that we were going to start anew
But you have already fallen in love with someone else

I will not cry in front of you, I hope you will quickly look away
I still feel miserable because I want to hear your voice

If we happen to meet again, I wouldn’t want to be separated from you
So let’s bring an end to this, because I still like you

 

Translation notes

1. Verse 6

“It’s not that I don’t like you”
Surely you know it hurts me a lot to hear you say that

Of all the mistakes I have noticed in the Chinese translations, this one is the most obvious because the verse is missing in the Chinese translation. In order to complete the song, I attempted a translation by putting the Japanese text through Kanji Converter and using the little knowledge I have on Japanese grammar. I think I did an okay job at it. I also modified it after feedback from tPenguinLTG (see comment below). Here is the verse in Japanese:

嫌いになったわけじゃないと 言ってくれた言葉が
余計に僕を苦しめてること もう君は知っているでしょ

Kirai ni natta wake ja nai to itte kureta kotoba ga
Yokei ni boku wo kurushimeteru koto mou kimi wa shitte iru desho

 

For some reason that I can’t explain, this song sounds flat to me. Unlike many of Oku Hanako’s songs, this one doesn’t stir any particular emotions in me. If I had to guess, I think the cause is the rhythm.

Or perhaps it is the result of Oku Hanako’s attempt to convey the singer’s conflicting feelings. The singer is happy because she likes the listener and she sees him wearing the watch she gave him. But the singer is given reason to feel sad when she learns that the listener likes someone else and thus won’t treat her the way she wants him to treat her. Emotionally, the singer still wants to be close to the listener in spite of that. Rationally, the singer knows that she needs to move on from her unrequited love. Both these thoughts are apparent in the last verse. To me, this song is set in the moment when both thoughts appear together in the singer’s mind, leaving her unsure what to feel.

 

Simplified Chinese

在你面前我不会落泪的  希望你能赶快移开目光
因为我还是很不争气的  喜欢着你

好久不见的你  感觉似乎改变了
穿着我没看过的衣服  头发也剪短了
但是手上戴着我看惯的手表
是我第一次送你的礼物
在你心中某处还有我的存在  让我觉得很高兴

要回到朋友关系  我果然还是无法做到
你明明就在身边  却再也无法传达给你

在你面前我不会落泪的  希望你能赶快移开目光
因为我还是很不争气的  喜欢着你

到底是那里出错  为什么会变成这样
即使翻着问题集  也找不到答案

在你面前我不会落泪的  就算被当成回忆
因为我还是很不争气的  喜欢着你

其实曾经有所期待  想要重新来过
但你却已经开始  喜欢上别人

在你面前我不会落泪的  希望你能赶快移开目光
因为我还是很不争气的  想要听你的声音

若能再次相遇的话  我不会再让你离开
所以就让我们结束吧  因为我还是喜欢着你

 

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4 comments

  1. Denny Sinnoh

    Although it may be a typical unrequited love Hanako Oku song, I am feeling that the singer is determined to become positive about the situation. I feel a “recovery” attitude in the song.

    As always, thank you for your efforts good sir.

    PS: I own this double DVD set:

    Like

    • Edward

      Now that you mention it, it does seem like the singer is trying to stay positive and hide her misery. I don’t quite think she’s really thinking about recovery or going through recovery, but that may be because we see slightly different settings for the song.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. tPenguinLTG

    “The verse is missing in the Chinese translation.” Gold. Here’s how I would have translated it, attempting to keep the order of the lines:

    Your having told me “It’s not that I don’t like you”
    is hurting me a lot, but you probably already know that

    I think the differences here between mine and yours are the tenses. Mine suggests that the listener had already said those words, whereas yours is a more hypothetical situation. I translate it this way because 言ってくれた is in the past tense. As well, I said “don’t” instead of your “didn’t” because although 嫌いになった is in the past tense, the verb なる is “to become” and describes the transition; the transition is over, so you’re left in the present with the second state, 嫌い. Another tense difference is with 苦しめてる: the て-form of a verb followed by いる, which can be shortened to てる by omitting the い in casual contexts, forms the present continuous tense (i.e. the “is -ing” tense).

    If I weren’t trying to keep the order of the lines, I’d move the last clause up as the first clause.

    For reference, although I don’t think these are the most accurate, YouTube user StringlessMoonDoll translated it as:

    You said; “It’s not that i hate you.”
    But you knew it, right? You know how it’s hurting me.

    and YouTube user No random invites. Will ignore translated it as:

    You told me before, you couldn’t possibly hate me.
    But that hurts me even more.

    although I do like how StringlessMoonDoll put it.

    As for the title, I think “of” works better than “to”.

    I try to avoid describing something as “flat” when in a musical context because it already has another meaning, but yeah, I agree, it feels a little flat. Musically, there’s not much variation in the melody’s range, dynamics, nor in her expression in the vocals; these stay mostly constant for the whole song, hence “flat”. It being “flat” might be one of the reasons I keep thinking of Boku ga Umareta Machi / 僕が生まれた街 instead whenever I see the title of this song.

    Like

    • Edward

      Thanks for sharing your thoughts. If I understand correctly, a more literal way to translate 嫌いになったわけじゃない would be “It’s not that I have come to hate you”. Yeah, “It’s not that I don’t like you” sounds better too. I’ll have to remember that a verb ending with てる is a shortening of ている. I’ve changed my translation to:

      “It’s not that I don’t like you”
      Surely you know it hurts me a lot to hear you say that

      Point taken on using “flat” to describe music. I looked it up since you mentioned it. The meaning I had in mind, which you understood anyway, was as in “a flat voice”. Please excuse my ambiguous use of “flat”, which is due to my lack of education in music. If you’ve wondered why my posts focus on the meaning of the lyrics instead of the music, that’s the reason why.

      Like

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